ok while waiting for my hair to dry before i sleep, decide to post some quick things. Just reach home like half an hour ago, went night cycling around the west. Later going again, was fun.

Sat 24 Jan 09

On a serious note, the feeling within me sucks yesterday, when i enter the chapel and heard Sister Wanping said bout giving thanks to God for things that You pray for He will answer it, whatever happen on the fateful day went through my mind again and again, it did not seems to stop, it felt bad, then came cell and it also sucks when u hear bout the good time spent together and spending new year as a family with everyone, your grandparent and relatives like your aunt, uncle and cousin, it just felt suck.

Anws Cheryl thanks for your understanding when i refuse to share some testimony about God.

Came home for 30 mins last night and out i went to cycle, travel around the west and back to Gombak only in the morning 10 am, it was fun, done lots of crazy stuff and had lots of fun, mayb its one of the way to relax and throw everything off :D

Nothing seems to change

Today is the 8th day of my grandfather death/supposedly 9 days of the funeral if we did 9 days, many things did not change much in the family, it always felt that it never happen, i still would look over to the pavilion where my grandfather would sit with his friends to talk, look into the stairways where my grandfather always sit to smoke, look at the sofa seat he always sat, things din seem to change much..... well its the past, let the wind take away the sadness, but lets keep the goodness within us. Like what sister Karen said, at least you had some happy memories with your grandfather.

Well today i was listening to the "New Life Worship Counting on God (Ross Parsley and The Desperation Band)" music CD while playing dota when i hear this

.....Though sorrow's my condition
And pain holds back no blow
Though this be my darkest hour
Your lamp is leading me home
Eyes can't see but i feel you near*
I know You're working through my tears
I trust you lord....

*Eyes can't see but i feel you near <----- This is bout God not my grandfather
in normal time while playing games and listening music, i am not the sort whom will listen to the lyrics, but its just so sudden that i caught this lyrics and it spoke of my condition, but it is still amazing, today did not attend church again coz my body cant take it and just "Job strike", did not have the strength to get out of bed, and still was in God presence so strongly but surprisingly i had the strength to last the whole 7 days of funeral, well this Glory goes to GOD for it, coz without God i dont think my body can take the 7 days of "beating".

Anws thanks these people for coming to my grandfather wake (name is by first letter alphabet)
Cheryl
Brother Calvin
Donric
Jian Le
Jie Xin
Kenneth
Kenny
Lu Wei
Sister Karen
Wayne

Glory be to God!

Maybe i will consider doing what Brother Calvin and Sister Karen said.......

Dismiss of my Grandfather

I always thought i was mentally strong enough to handle things, to not cry when things happen. But when i knew something was wrong i prayed, and the second time they return i knew things were real bad from the voice, when i heard the dismiss of my Grandfather.....for the first time after so long i cried.....

Bukit Batok West Avenue 5 Block 391
Funeral is situated at under the block near the lift
10 Jan to 16 Jan. 16 Jan cremating in morning
Estate Name: Good View Garden

For info, estate is opposite home team NS, is consider the most new estate in Gombak. The one that look like a condo from outside