Today felt totally different from normal church svr i was like totally different and my heart is like something oppressing on me it all began after i bath then suddenly i dun feel like going to church today but nevertheless i went to church but after i repel the oppression , when i went to church , the oppression became stronger n when it was praise and worship my heart was like not there n i did not have the heart to worship God but as svr goes on the oppression became lesser n soon it was gone but God not only remove the oppression He even spoke to me thru today svr....there is this part of the sermon where it says "the more you struggle to be free , the tighter it grab onto you" and then it suddenly dawn on me that i was struggling to be free from my past like u noe that i could not let go of my past in last week blog , for the past one week , i was trying to free myself from the past instead of letting God do the job.....then in this week instead of being better , i became worse in my temper and the past is getting the best of me n even grabbing to me even more.....after cell stayed for catering for the first time then stay n help out in the kitchen after that for tomoro cafe duty...it was rather fun preparing the thing but when i m peeling the eggshells i was like ewwwww....the egg was not cook fully and it was like a little jelly but nvm finish the job nevertheless with Brendan , Rebekah and Gladys(dunno if this rite) then went out to have a breather for it was a little stuffy inside after that we kept the tables and chair back into the shed its was rather fun , me and Nick was like joking ard a little while keeping it...now i noe how much they had gone through carrying the chair everything back after catering everything though it was a little tiring , it was very fun n a whole new experience for me....b4 going back while waiting for my father sister Wanping sat down n talk to me then when she call out my name i was like eh....how she noe my name but nvm n she said that she knew my studies is not very good and told me that as a christian we should do our best for everything then she ask me to go church office every sat to study n revise at 11 with Cheryl then i say see first....i dunno if want to go a not lei...think first